Saturday, November 25, 2006

You Know You've Lived in Egypt Too Long When ...

I did not compose this- but so much of it is sooo true that I thought I would share it with you all...I added some of my own in italics..

- You're not surprised to see a goat in the passenger seat
- (you're not suprised when the taxi driver lights up a cigarette- in fact the opposite it true)
- You expect the confirmation on your airline ticket to read "insha'allah"
- You don't expect to eat dinner before 10:30 p.m. (mine was 1 am last night!)
- You need a sweater when it's 80 degrees outside (oh yes- I am there!!!)
- You believe that speed limits are only advisory (since I don't drive in Egypt I can't give first hand info on these ones- but it gives you a sense of the road 'system' )
-You have no problem with tractors driving 40kph on the highway
- You fully expect to go to jail when a local national hits the back of your car at a stop sign
- You know which end of a shawarma to unwrap first
- You think that the further you inch into the middle of an intersection, the faster the light will turn green
- You consider it normal for the same section of the road to be dug up three times by contractors in the space of a few weeks (I got used to this happening in Edinburgh!!)
- You understand that the true definition of a nanosecond is the time interval between the light turning green and the guy behind youhonking his horn
- You can receive every TV station crystal clear except the local one
- You get used to using the cold water tap to get hot water during the summer ( and when your electricity socket flashes blue whenever you put in a plug)
- You make left turns from the far right lane without a second thought
- You expect gold for every birthday
- You think Pepsi begins with a "B" (and Blease!!)
- You think that a box of kleenex belongs on every dinner table (and in every car)
- You think water only comes in bottles
- You understand that when someone says "Bukra (tomorrow), Insha'Allah" to you it really means "Sometime during this calendar year"...if you're lucky!
- When you don't bat an eyelid to see Dad, Mum sitting side-saddle holding babe in arms on a scooter. (or indeed- someone holding a goat on a scooter- I have seen this!!!)
- Opening a bank account with the air -con guy working in the background, his mate brings in his lunch and they sit there eating. (security???)
- when 5 people turn up to change a tap washer, but they havent got a washer, and the only tool they've got is a hammer, and they want you to give them lunch before they start. (they don't get it!!!)
- you don't think anything of phoning the chemist to send you some antibiotics that you have prescribed to yourself- ie not via doctor
- you expect to have a fight with a taxi driver about the fare,and are suprised if you don't.
- you want past an Egyptian male friend in the street, who is calling to you, because you have effectivly switched your horn tooting and comment hearing radar off.

I am sure I could make up a few more- but that will do for now! more reviews of dance workshops and dancers I have seen later...


Olesya said...

Hahaha - this is a good one.
Guess all those are things that make you feel you are actually alive! Scotland is so much more reserved! And far too polite drivers - I often wonder how will the bad drivers improve if they don't get tooted at?

PS is it actually true about an airline ticket??....
Any why is Pepsi starting with B???


Anonymous said...

Hahahaha no its not actually true about the airline ticket, and they pronounce pepsi with a B because there is no P in the Arabic language. Most of the these are true, and some are exaggerated. I know this because I'm Egyptian :)