The longest journey ever between Cairo and Alexandria! -Cruise part 4

So, to recap the cruise story so far.

I flew to Rhodes, via Athens. I joined the ship MS Noordam... and then we promptly sailed directly back to Egypt.

When we did arrive at Alexandria one of the first things for me was the relief that my internet worked again.  Sad, but true. The day at sea was too far away from anywhere to pick up 3G, so I had been a day without internet. No facebook, no connecting with friends, no IMessage. If I had been ready for it, I suspect I would have dealt with it better, but I hadn’t thought about not being able to use my phone on ship at least and felt trapped. It is amazing isn’t it, how in the few years that wide use of the internet has developed our dependency on it has increased so dramatically. You can buy internet cards on the ship, but they are very expensive and the connection very slow. I have to admit- I did panic and buy a card. I think it would be healthy for me to try to go for longer periods of time offline. So as soon as I publish this blog and update my facebook, and check twitter for latest Egypt news, then that’s what I will do... for an hour or so at least!

I digress. So, the ship is in Alex. I plan to meet a friend who is from there for lunch. I walked from the ship to the corniche, though some of the most rubbish strewn streets I have seen for a while which really saddened me. When I walked from the ship to shore I met guests from the ship coming back saying to me- ‘don’t do it... it’s filthy, don’t go there! I laughed, thinking they were just comparing ‘normal Egypt with their spotless clean ship’. No. They were right.

   I know things are tough financially, politically, every which way really, but please- have some pride in your country, even just your little bit of it. Imagine how all these two thousand tourists, getting off their 5 star ship and stepping directly into that view you and your country. And their opinion should count, if you want Egypt to do well the tourist rates need to increase. Unfortunately, our two days docked at Alex made almost everyone on board totally confused as to why I would choose to live in a dump like Egypt. Their words, not mine. I found myself having to defend my chosen home over and over again, although with a lot of it, I unfortunately did agree with them. How much respect would it need to put your rubbish in your pocket until you get home instead of throwing in the street? To smile and welcome people to the country without the hard sell that actually most found aggressive and frightening (and didn’t result in sales?)? Come on Egyptians, I know you can do better than this. Please.

Actually, while I am on my rant, humour me please readers. On my way to the corniche the call to prayer was sounding. It was Friday. One man tried to walk up close to me, making sexual comments. I shouted at him, ‘shame on you, cant you hear the sound from the mosque?’ he looked mortified that I had pulled him up on what he was doing and apologised and ran away. Egypt needs more reminders about the respect involved in following Islam. For yourself and for women. It shouldn’t need the infidel bellydancer to remind a Muslim man that he should be paying attending to the prayer, not to my backside. And while I am on the subject. On the way back to the ship after drinking my fresh juice (lunch got cancelled so had a wander about Alex instead- which totally closes on a Friday- good to know if you ever want to do tourist stuff there- Not on a Friday!!) a man tried to do the usual, ‘hello... whats you name? Where you from?’. I answered him in Arabic asking him to leave me alone, he replied... ‘Ah you are Arab...are you from Syria? Do you think the way you are dressed is appropriate for an Arab?’ It is the first time someone has openly tried to control what I wear in this way, and if my Arabic had been better I would have told him exactly what I thought of him and his attitude. As it was I ignored him and kept walking and felt sorry, yet again for what Egypt is becoming. Alexandria, the ‘European city of the middle east’, yeah right. The next day I saw a much nicer side to the city and I'll show that to you in the next blog entry! It wasn't all disappointing!

I need to balance all the above with a positive, in case people reading this think I am just using it all as an excuse to bash Egypt. I love this country and I see it’s potential. I do see the positives too. The lovely place I had my juice at laid out a tray of juice and a box of oranges and were handing them out to people as they came out of the mosques and to the beggars in the street. The caring and sharing that Islam does preach in action. It was good to see.

OK. So, the surprise I was writing about my blog last time; usually when a ship is in port they contact the port agent who gets them a ‘local band’ to come and entertain them. I got very excited when Margo (Entertainment manager) said this... does this mean I get to dance with them? With a live band? She said yes. Then I told her it was a shame I hadn’t known about this, I could have brought my band up from Cairo. She asked me to quote a price. My band came back with a price, that to be honest I felt was way too expensive, and I told her just to get the Alex band. She however told me the port agent was asking for double what I had quoted! I couldn’t believe it. The amount of money that man must have been pocketing for himself was mammoth! She asked me to bring my band. Yippee. I was getting to dance in this huge theatre, with my own band. I was so excited!

The band arrived late. The port agent created problems because he was so angry at them and me since he lost out on the deal. He told security that they shouldn’t get into the port etc. It took about two hours to clear up. To see their faces when they saw the ship I was working on was worth every second. It didn’t harm that Margo is stunningly beautiful and they all though that a real life Barbie was greeting them! 

Most of the band haven’t been abroad at all. So, to come aboard and find this other world, full of different peoples and luxury and way of talking with each other, It blew their minds a bit! They all commented when Margo bent to pick up some nails that had dropped on the floor in the pools area, amazed that a manager would do that, not just stand and shout loudly for someone else to do it. They wanted her to come and take over the Pharaohs. I have to agree with them! Said, the tannoura when he was checking the stage before our show said,’ I can’t believe we are still in Egypt. I feel like I am abroad’. I felt proud I had been able to bring them this experience.

They played in the gazebo by the pool on top deck while everyone was eating their BBQ. It went well. I of course had been busy organising security clearance etc etc and was needed to translate everything for them, so hadn’t even gotten changed yet. I left them to what I knew they did best, and ran for my 20 minute shower, hair make up costume! It was all very stressful getting them from that stage, via a super fast food and cigarette break down to the main theatre on time. Herding cats might have been easier. We made it 2 minutes before curtain! I of course still hadn’t finished make up or gotten into costume so I told them to play a song before my entrance. It worked well.

The show went really well. I danced. The tannoura span, I took the mic and got everyone doing some audience participation from their seats. I love dancing, I love teaching and I love entertaining. This show combined all three and I felt totally at home. I just wish we had had longer. The hour was possibly the fastest in my life!

Everyone loved it, and Margo told me it was the best local entertainment they had ever had on any ship she had been on. What a relief! We went up to deck again for a cup of tea and relax before getting the band onto their bus and sending them back to Cairo. Oh and the photos.. Everyone was desperate to get a picture beside the beautiful Margo. It was very funny to watch!

And, the good news, the whole show was filmed... so watch this space until I manage to work out how to edit and upload it!!

What a day! I was totally drained, but happy, when I collapsed into bed!

On being a lazy bellydancer!

Working as a dancer in Cairo is a lot like waiting on buses these days. There can be literally weeks without any work at all... and then once your body has relaxed, the muscles have stopped responding as they should and your mood as dropped to an all time low because you are depressed from the lack of movement... then and only then do you suddenly get flooded with work day after day so that your muscles ache and your friends think you have dropped off the side of a cliff!

I am not complaining. Honest. 11 days in a row, performing anything between 1 and 6 shows in a day, is what I moved to Cairo to do!

I am pointing out my failures again. Why oh why when I get days off do I not do more exercise so that my ‘on’ days are less of a surprise to my poor muscles?!!! I never used to have to worry about these things. When I lived in Scotland I was teaching 25 classes per week on top of performing and going out salsa dancing!

Now... now I have become so lazy. I know what I ‘should’ do. I should be drilling moves at home. I should be doing my press ups and sit ups, my stair climbing. I should make a point of going out to salsa. Yes I should.

I think too much. I do too little. I bring myself down.

I rest and then my mood slumps and it is near impossible to move to do the basic stuff of life, never mind ‘extra’ exercise!

I guess routine is the answer to this issue. Push myself to do something every morning when I wake up........ but there is always an excuse; My back is sore from work last night- I should rest, I am late for meeting someone I need to leave house, I need to save my energy for work later on tonight... you name it. I am the world’s best at procrastination!

The only thing I seem good at now is always preferring to climb the stairs to the flat rather than taking the lift (11 floors). However, I don’t leave the house enough to make much of a difference!

I am so bad at pushing myself to exercise alone that I wish social fitness wasn’t so expensive. Gyms in Cairo are very expensive. Pools to go just for a swim are rare and also expensive. Fitness classes, Pilates, yoga etc are available... but again highly priced. I need to exercise because there isn’t enough regular daily work to keep my body strong for the times that there is, but without the work I don’t have the funds to pay for a gym!

See.... always an excuse.

Truth is I am a lazy bellydancer.

I have always been blessed in dance. I learn quickly without having to actually put in a lot of mental or physical work. I know many people who profess to hate me because of this! (I hope they are joking!) The idea of drilling moves fills me with such a dread that it takes away the joy I get from the dance.

So what to do......... This is the point in this blog entry when I say 'Yalla- I am going to do X, Y and Z. Everyday'. I am going to get super fit and strong again (like I used to be).

But I won’t.

I know myself too well.

I will start it. Whatever the ‘regime’ of the moment it. The after a day or two, sometimes even a week or two... that’s it. I am sitting about doing nothing and getting weak and depressed again.

When I analyse my character, look at my good and bad points, this laziness always comes out as the thing I hate most about myself and one of the major things that stops me ‘going further’ in life.

Do I just need to get a grip? Get tougher on myself? Or do I accept that sometimes I will be crazy active and nonstop dancing, and other times I just won’t be?

They say that realising your issues is the first step to dealing with them... I am hoping now I have written this and shamed myself in public that somehow I will just magically turn into some highly motivated being. That would be nice. Maybe.

Maybe I'll think more about that tomorrow....

The 'real me' gives you- Tour spring 2013 feedback

This blog entry is a bit of an ego fest I am afraid.... the thing is – I have received so much lovely feedback on my performances, workshops and private classes across the UK over the last 4 weeks, that I wanted to show them off, I mean erm, share them with you!! Hehe.

That first paragraph is from the public 'fun' Lorna... Here is a little bit of the real me;

My previous blog was all about the insecurities I know that I share with many other dancers all over the world. How life as a dancer can be difficult at times. Many people came back to me about that entry and said how much it spoke to them. That it helped them to know they weren't the only one to feel that way. That blog entry has so many heartfelt comments attached to it now. Thank you for taking the time to share your feelings and wishing you all the happiness in your world of dance.

One of my biggest failings in life, not just dance, is focusing on the negative. I do it a lot. Too much. Ironically, only my own failings, or perceived failings. With other people, and especially my students I can only ever see the positives and potentials. So why can I never seem to do that for myself? I know it's not healthy but I haven't worked out a way round it yet.

 For example; I might get 5 compliments after a show, but one tiny 'look' the wrong way (never mind a comment) will be the one thing I see and feel. A whole good show will get thrown away as rubbish in my head because I feel someone 'hinted' that it could have been better. I might have a full class, but then take it to heart if someone leaves early (even if they have given me a perfectly good reason why they would have to!!!!) Over sensitive and over self critical. Not exactly a positive place to grow from.

Also, because of the afore mentioned insecurities, often when I get feedback on my work I brush it off as 'they are just being nice', or 'they don't know any better',  anything really so as not to listen to it. I am not really sure where this urge to punish myself comes from... but I have been told recently by a close friend that if I spoke to her the way I speak to myself then our friendship would have ended a long time ago! I hear her, and I understand what she is saying, but find it so very hard to be kind to myself. 


This blog entry is a bit of therapy for me... you don't have to read it... but I had to write it. 


I have gone through my emails and facebook over the last month and picked out all the lovely, positive things people have said about me and my work during this past tour. I hope they will be ok with me sharing them. I haven't asked permission to share because there are just so many! These lovely comments are part of what keeps me going at times I might be tempted to give it all up.

 I need to listen to them a little more and perhaps even believe a couple of them from time to time! Wish me luck....!

And a huge thanks to Karen Price for these lovely photos of some of my new costumes! 

Here goes... 'the Lorna love fest' ;



“Wow!!!!! Today has been awesome. I learnt so many things today....... 1. Be yourself. 2. There are no rules. 3. If you don't know what to do with your arms take them up and then use them to have a conversation with the audience 4. That a stick can be used for something other than Saaidi dancing - it looks amazing when performed slowly Baladi style 5. Some useful tips on how to transition from one move to another 6. How to dance to the whole audience at the same time. Not to mention our evening out .....Ladies, if you missed out on tonight - you really missed a treat! Lorna was amazing not just with her dancing but with her insight into life in Cairo as a dancer. A huge thank you to Lorna.” Karen 



“If I learned anything today it's that British ladies CAN! Thank you Lorna xxx “ Angela 

Happy? who...? Me? whatever gave you that idea?

“Lorna of Cairo is a wonderful teacher and dancer x” Vanessa 



"Fantastic workshops with Lorna of Cairo today! Really inspired by her warm and generous teaching style and having had a day of eureka moments, lots of quiet reflection will follow. Really affirming day. Thank you so much for giving me the courage and the permission to start putting together my own sentences - I’ve got the words, I can now put them together, hopefully to create something wonderful! Excellent workshops - fulfilled me in so many ways and still have the heady feeling of a great days dancing. It was so good to know that it was ok to try out new moves, to play around and not have so much verbatim technique. So it is with great delight that my limited rule book was officially binned. For me, it's all about permission to dance, keeping the integrity, whilst maintaining a healthy respect for the dance and its culture. Once we allow ourselves that, we can fly as dancers. I need to have that message regularly drummed into me which is why I loved the workshops so much. Lorna is a wonderful teacher and dancer. "Abi 

“the Eureka moment only came to me at the very end when I danced like a lunatic to the last song and then I realised what Lorna meant and I knew I had to dance like that to Baladi - now my challenge is to find some Egyptian music which really makes me wants to dance like that. “ 
Karen 

“Had fantastic workshop today with Lorna of Cairo, loved every minute (I can feel my legs until now). You are a star xxxxx “ Sarasvati

Insecurity

I have decided to write this blog entry because I have a feeling it might help other dancers to feel less ‘alone’.

We live in a highly competitive world. I feel like professional artists (and I will talk about dancers specifically since that is what I really know about) have pressures seldom found in other work places. For example:

-We, dancers are rarely seen as having a ‘proper’ job.

-We, dancers are often expected to dance for very little money or sometimes invited along to places to dance for fun (i.e. for free!).

-We, dancers are judged on our age, looks and figure, our ability as teachers and performers as well as on our dance skills.

All of these things, and this list is by no means exclusive, make things hard when we are trying to make a living in an already competitive field. Bellydance especially is a field where you find many women who will happily dance for free or for cheap rates because dance is not their main source of income, therefore they can afford to, and do, without considering the effect that has on ‘the market’ for those of us for whom dance is our sole income.

All these points and many more like them are often the bulk of discussion forums and articles.

This is not however the main topic of my blog today.

What gets me the most is the self doubt, insecurity, feelings of being a fraud, feelings of inadequacy that I get as a dancer and I hear from other dancers time and time again. ‘I am stuck in a rut’; ‘no matter what I do my dancing doesn’t seem to improve’, ‘what’s the point? I’m never going to be x,y,z’.

The problem in art is that you are only a good artist if people ‘like’ your work. And what people like is guided by so many factors. Their personal artistic likes and dislikes, cultural awareness, their experiences, what the people around them are saying, reviews, their own insecurities and jealousies etc etc.

So yes, we get through this by dancing for ourselves- to be as good as we can be.

But, let’s be honest, this only really works as long as dance is your hobby i.e. you are not trying to earn your living by dancing in front of an audience.

As soon as an audience becomes involved the stakes get raised. We want the people we are dancing for to like us, to appreciate us, to rate us. That is human nature.  We get stage fright. Some get so scared they don’t even perform or they don’t perform to the level they feel they should or could.

That’s when the beatings start.

Beating yourself up that is! (Not some kind of S & M thing!!!)

I cannot count how many times I have come off stage so upset and angry at myself because I feel I have let myself down. It doesn’t matter what people say after a show like that. I wave away their compliments. I focus on anything and everything negative (usually exaggerating it way out of proportion). The people who are saying nice things are just saying that because they are my friend, or people they don’t know any better, or because they feel they ‘should’ say something, not because they really feel it.

I can’t count how many times in the years I have danced I have been in tears when I come off stage. Angry at myself for having, in my eyes, let the audience, and myself down. Of course, that is never what anyone ever says to me... but I feel it. And it burns.

Usually, when these attacks of insecurity hit, I feel what I did was ‘boring’. That I repeated the same move over and over again. In the past, when I have felt this on stage, I push myself to do more and more technique. To show off moves to ‘prove’ to the audience and myself that I CAN do this. Unfortunately that is the very thing that comes back to bite me. By trying so hard, I start thinking and stop feeling. When I stop feeling, I stop enjoying. If I am not enjoying my dance how can I expect anyone in my audience to enjoy it too? Then if I suddenly panic on stage that the audience are not enjoying it I try harder and fail more. See the problem? Of course, my friends would say that I am over exaggerating the problem, that my dancing is never boring etc. Bless them. They might even be right. But when you work yourself up into in insecure state like that it is hard to listen.

So, I am aware of it now... aware of the spiral I follow when I get myself into a state and I guess that is the main part of the battle.

Now, if I start to feel a little wobbly mid show, and it still happens, on a more often than I care to admit frequency, I am able to see what is happening and stop the descent into hysteria.

Nothing worse than a hysterical bellydancer!

So... what I do is I stop. Literally. I stop on stage... and do the most basic of moves.. Very concentrated and slow. Even if the music is fast, I find something in the music that is slower and I circle or figure 8 that ‘thing’ until I am breathing more normally again. I also force myself to look into the eyes of my audience and smile. A smile that says I am really happy I am here dancing for you and isn’t this music amazing? Not a smile that begs ‘like me like me like me’. A smile that connects with someone and says to them ‘isn’t this figure 8 just the most perfect thing to do to this music?!! It feels fantastic’.

It works every single time. I make eye contact, I connect with someone and instantly I am like Popeye after some spinach. I feel recharged and confident and all because I took it down a notch (ok- sometimes a LOT of notches). From then on I feel that at least one person in the audience is with me and already thinks I am good so I am dancing for them!

Often in class I ask people to think of a family party or wedding. Imagine everyone up on the dancefloor, after a few glasses. Do you watch the younger pretty girls who are self-conscious and doing pretty but ‘safe’ moves? or do you watch mad Uncle Albert who is being silly and having a wild time to himself? The uncle, right? Why? Because it makes us happy to watch people having a good time. It is really difficult not to smile if someone is so obviously happy. Even more so if they are smiling at you. Especially when you feel that smile is heartfelt. If you smile, even if you don’t feel happy at the time, just the act of smiling can make you happier. So if you feel like that when you are watching uncle Albert, why wouldn’t other people feel like that watching you, doing the thing you love more than anything else (dance!!!) ? Share with them how happy it makes you.

It works for me.

That’s how I do it on stage...........

Off stage is harder. All those times you question your own ability. Especially when you are home, having a fat day (we ALL have them!), in pain, and/or feeling that there just isn’t any point to it all. Believe it or not, almost every time the answer to this dilemma is DANCE. It often helps me to go out clubbing or salsa dancing... so I am dancing and getting my endorphins flowing again but without the stresses involved in practising ‘moves’ and ‘trying’ to get them right. That trying thing again, see?

It is good to doubt yourself from time to time. If you think you have reached the top, achieved perfection... then you never will. You stop learning. You stop pushing yourself.

Each time I have a big bout of self doubt it is ALWAYS followed with a Eureka moment about my dance and another step up on that every expanding ladder I am climbing in my head. It is hard to remember that at the time of course.... at the time I just want to crawl into a dark space and hide, make it all go away. Yet every time I do come out the other side having ‘realised’ something that helps me progress. It might be a tiny thing, or it might be a complete mental turnaround, but almost always it is something from inside of me. Nothing to do with ‘technique’ or ‘steps’. Yet often the blackness has been caused by worry about just those things!

I am sharing all this, because I know I am not alone in these fears... and I hope that if you are reading this and relating to any of it then maybe some of my experiences can help you get a little hope.

I’d love to be confident in life, and in dance. I’d love to really feel I was the ‘best’ at something. The thing is... I don’t actually believe such a thing exists. (Which is why I can never really get behind the concept of bellydance competitions- but that is a whole other can of worms I don’t want to get into here). I remember being at a salsa convention and one of my friends asking a stunning young Cuban girl ‘isn’t it difficult being so beautiful?’ she was of course being flippant, however the girl actually stopped and turned and thought and said, ‘yes, sometimes it is’. She had a sad look on her face at the time. We put ourselves down so much, all the time, sometimes we need to step back and accept the true level of things, without pushing ourselves up, or down... and wondering from there how we can improve how we feel about our level. Because it’s the happiness, contentedness, acceptance of who we are and why we love dance that counts.

Every single person who started to learn bellydance did it because music made them happy. Music made them want to move. Why when we get caught up into the ‘hows and whys’ do we lose that joy?

So, next time you are feeling a bellydance block, just do whatever you need to do to get that Joy back....... and everyone will stop and watch you dance. I promise. 

Reasons for being....

Seemingly it was 30degrees here in Cairo today... maybe thats why i just felt urged to do something i really dont do enough of... i got my bikini on, shut the balcony curtains off to one side (to block out the flats opposite) and sunbathed all afternoon! It was BLISS. I feel relaxed and alive again. With all the recent going ons in Cairo, and the massively reduced work load (and therefore income) i have been having to question whether Cairo is really the place for me or not. A day in the sun, in mid March, reconfirmed one of the many things i love about this city!!!!

My guests, 3 dancers from UK, left this afternoon. It's been lovely having them here. Fun moments have included going to a cabaret club that was open from 8pm so we could go and still be home before curfew and was owned by an ex dancer nicknamed Tuna who is quite frankly NUTS.

Also having the girls come to see my show and for a rare change me actually feeling like I had performed well- I tend to beat myself up a lot about my dancing, so that was a really nice change and afterwards 2 of us went on to the Cairo Jazz Club where they had a boogie night (also starting and finishing before curfew) and dancing crazily to everything from michael jackson to duran duran to will smith to cameo! It was relive the 80's night (wasn't billed as that- but totally was that and was amazing fun!).

The girls had some private classes too while they were here. They went over one morning to Yasmina's and had a class with her. Then the Next day Sara Farouk came over and gave them a couple of hours, and then a class with me the next day. I love having a studio in the house to be able to dance and teach when ever the mood takes and also to be able to host other teachers...The class was fun too- talented girls made it a joy!

We went to watch the beautiful Sabriya perform too. She was just lovely! I didn't know what style to expect since she has learned mostly in the USA, is turkish/swedish and has worked mainly throughout the middle east, Tunisia to Dubai to Syria etc etc . It wasn't particularly Egyptian style- but it was a VERY good show with 4 costume changes, lots of lovely moves and best thing was her very relaxed and comfortable way of interacting with her audience. We all liked it a lot!!!

They did even more than that in their 4 days with me... but i had to rest up one evening with a bad cold and tummy... but thats when i managed to get my apartments pics online- so the time wasn't wasted!

Oh, and then there was the costume fitting at midnight!!!! So much for curfew... since they were flying this morning the costume maker came to my house and spent 2 hours here doing final fittings and alterations to them in my dance studio! With a vanilla cola afterwards it was a much more relaxed way of doing the costume fitting than going to the shop to do it!!!

YES- there are LOTS of reason why I love this city and all the things you can do in it- even with a curfew.

I think I'll be staying..........!!! (Inshallah!)

If you'd like to come to Cairo and enjoy it the way I do, why not stay with me at the 'Hotel BellyLorna' !!! I've uploaded a lot of photos of the place onto facebook ... have a look and book soon for a memorable holiday!!!

http://www.facebook.com/bellylorna/posts/10150424218020635#!/album.php?aid=60715&id=113086788706897&fbid=208905759124999

Happy New Year!!!

oh what a night!

I performed on the Nile Pharoah boat last night, 4 shows and then the 'temple' as they call it; the area between the 2 boats. I really really enjoyed myself. Especially when i got my singer to memorise the words for Laylet Eid ( a Fayrouz song to the tune of jingle bells!!!) and came out on stage in my santa costume! They look on everyones faces was priceless! lets just say- it was a massive hit, with the band, the staff and the customers. Although perhaps especailly with the phototgraphers since EVERYONE , including the staff (!) wanted there photo taken with santa Lorna!!!

great fun, and for a change i didn't have to run off to do other jobs after the shows since we finished so late. Which was a relief since I have a horrible chest infection, i suspect due to 3 days spent in airports over the last 10 days!!

i went home for christmas, and was stuck in amsterdam airport for 2 days due to the snow, then on my return, i got stuck in glasgow and then again in heathrow due to fog! My suitcase, containing the new costumes I had specially made for the show in glasgow on the 28th were in the case... which eventually arrived on the 27th! one day before I was due to leave again. So I had one day to unpack and repack! needless to say, with the fog effects, my suitcase has not managed to arrived here to cairo either. in fact, in the 13 days since I started my journey home and back, the case has only been in my custody for 2 of them!

Despite all that christmas was lovely. Snowy, cold (-17deg!) but lovely. I spent a lot of quality time with my family and with a few friends. Next time hopefully I'll get to party more!

It's good to start a new year and still be a bellydancer on the Nile!
Sometimes I really can't believe how a girl form scotland can end up here doing this job, but I am so happy and grateful that I am! Long may it continue!

I have a massively busy house over the next 6 weeks with total of 8 house guests due over that time, .. 6 of those due in the same week (not sure how this will work, but we'll squeeze together somehow!) we are going to have fun!

 If anyone is in Cairo and wants to come see me dance I am performing on the Golden pharoah 9-12th Jan and the Nile pharoah 13-15th Jan.

off to track down that missing suitcase now.......

grrr- number frustration

I took my new mobile phone to a shop tonight to get it unlocked- they promised all the data would remain- they WIPED ALL MY NUMBERS!!!!!!!!!! I am stranded!

please- all my friends who read this- please send me an sms to my Egyptian number (or emial me) with your number so I can save it !!!

so- I have had house guests for the last 4 nights- am now alone til thursday when the next lot of guests arrive... and working EVERY NIGHT. really glad to be working though. have a new Org player (what they call keyboards here!) and he is very good- unfortunalty he seems to know different versions of lots of the songs I dance to- so i am improvising on stage a lot more than usual! keeping me on my toes though (literally and figuratively). Also he doesn't yet know my entrance music- which is a shame, cos it was a lot nicer than the one I am having to fall back on! Thankfully i have had a run of really good audiences, so workwise things are going OK.

hospital

at home, when you get an pain that wont go away you go to your GP.

here in Cairo we dont really have such a thing. Instead you go to your nearest hospital, pay some money to see a 'gp' and do everything there.

Last night I had taken all the pain I could- for the 3rd night running I still had horrific pain in my back, to one side and was still throwing up at least twice a day. I suspected it was kidney trouble (had it once before long time ago and will never forget the pain!) and was so sick and tired of everyone saying its a cold , you just have a cold ( my granny would have called it a chill in yer kidneys) so after work ( a laughable affair with me throwing up in the toliet once my music has already started and trying to get out there and smile away the tears....) my singer drove me to a hospital in Medan Vini in Dokki.

It cost 100le to go in just to speak to the doctor on call that night ( in a mix of broken egnlish and broken arabic), and he too suspected it was just a cold! Hmmm

he did however give me an examination and 2 pain injections - 40 le. (my bum still hurts from those!!!!_

Then I had to go upstairs to give a urine sample- which was analyises right there and then for 50le total.

Within minutes the results howed it was in fact kidney infection (possible a stone- but have to go back at end of the week for that x-ray) and I was bundled off home with 4 perscriptions for antibiotics etc etc which came to the total of 50 le.

so- as much as I love the NHS in UK, and yes it is free- I would not have got that all dealt with within and hour or so back home!

So today i am home feeling sorry for myself and popping drugs all day. trying not to throw up (failed twice this morning) and thinking about packing my bags for my flight to Sharm tomorrow morning to go visit my sister who is on holiday there for next 3 days. wish I felt better... but guess I can rest there as well as I can rest here- its just the travel I am not looking fwd to!

so apologies to all of you who have emailed me in the last couple of weeks... what with the scotland trip, then back straight into work, then siwa, and now sick then sharm- I've beeen really lazy with the emails- bare with me.... I promise I am not ignoring you all!

off to bed now............ for a little while before I actually pack!

Good news re website!

The hijackers have been ousted!!!!

a good friend of mine (Kapil- thank you soooo much!!!) last night managed to solve my website problem.... and find my lost pages for my website too!

so now if you type www.bellylorna.com or www.bellylorna.co.uk they will both bring you directly to this blog!

and since he found the lost info from before too- when i get back to cairo i will set about constructing an actual website to go with the blog too! I'm a very happy bunny!

and a very stressed one too- how much STUFF can one girl collect in her life?????? I am renting out my edinburgh flat from this coming monday and have spent the entire last week clearing and cleaning.... the charity shops love me! still so so much to do.... but have to mention last saturday..

I performed at Alicia and Antony's wedding! I have been close friends with Alicia since we were 10 years old..... to be asked to perform at her wedding really didn't come as a surprise- but my nerves just as i started were. Why oh why is it so much harder to dance when you know it is your friends special day......desperate to impress, and not to mess it up i guess....?!!! Anyway- it all went well- although since bellydance isn't exactly a traditional part of a UK wedding (unlike Egypt) people weren't very sure how to respond, I did manage to get most of the wedding party on the dance floor though! I had fun- and so did the couple- looking fwd to seeing some photos- since I wore my new mango coloured pharonics- VERY NICE!

back to the packing now........

Costumers in Cairo, and moulids and stuff!

Just realised for all the talking i do (ok- well writing actually) here about my new costumes etc etc _ I rarely give the costume designers themselves a plug..... and they deserve it.... so here goes...

If you want to see Eman Zaki designs and contact her , or her sister Hoda directly , their website is www.EmanZaki.com and the emial is emanzaki@emanzaki.com there- not too hard to remember!

For Amera el Kattan (aka Pharonics )- harder to track down online- so I'll come back to this one!!! I have a phone number for her- but as yet no website or email- I think that is to protect the people who sell her costumes on, mainly in the states....... I'll research it- or at least get an email for you if possible!!!

For Oriental Moon www.orientalmooncairo.com

For Aida Nour costumes you can arrange to go see her, or check out which festivals she is teaching, and selling costumes at through her website. http://hem.passagen.se/aidanour/aida.htm or email aidanour@hotmail.com

For Raqia Hassan costumes http://www.raqiahassan.net/co.html I have not bought one of these yet- but the pictures look good!

So- there are lots of others............. and I often find some nice items from Mahmoud and Yasser in Khan el Khalili too...............



Today was 37 degrees. Very hot and sticky. I can hardly believe it. Was cold really not that long ago at all. Not a complaint- just a comment!

Having some work done in my flat over the next 2 weeks- mirrors getting put up in my 'spare' room to turn it into a proper studio for the private classes i get here at home and curtain rails put up on the balcony to shelter my huge livingroom windows from the afternoon sun, and so that I get some privicy to be able to sit out there and sunbathe without causing a riot amoung my neighbours!

I must mention mothers day. It was on friday here.... and a pretty huge event. People were saying congratualtions to me even- when i asked why- I was told becuase its a celebration day for all women- when I persisted and said- No its a day for all 'mothers' they argued no, no, for all women! weird. Anyway- well OTT, like valentines day... and when I said to a friend- we won't be able to get a seat in any restaurant today- he asked why- mothers seemingly dont get taken out for their meal- they still have to cook for the extended family on 'their' day! of course.........

It was also the Moulid Al-Nabi , the Prophets birthday, last week- which meant huge dolls and big boxes of sweets on sale everywhere. If for some reason you should be interested in making a moulid doll out of sugar, i found this bizarre with indepth info about it!!! http://www.sis.gov.eg/En/Arts&Culture/Folklore/AlMoulidsDoll/070704000000000001.htm

To read a really great review of another moulid celebration- check out this journalists experience of moulid el-hussain last year... http://sparkslockout.blogspot.com/2007/06/moulid.html

oh- and Happy Easter everyone.... my 2nd Easter in a row without a chocolate egg- does that mean i have to be a grown up now??????? I don't want toooooo :-( !!!!!

coming soon.......

.... to cairo - fly back 'home' tomorrow!

Have been running about in Edinburgh, well, across Scotland actually, for over a week- hence no blog entries... but once i get a chance to sit and type it all expect to read up about the following..

-how my workshops and performances in Scotland went... with some student reviews...
-dancing for Scots on board the Pharoah...
-New costume designer in Cairo......
-My new costumes- with pics!!! (anyone reading this who took good photos on the night of the bellydance banquet- please send any nice pics you have of me..... !!!!!)
-how it feels leaving Edinburgh....
-anyone interested in renting a flat in Edinburgh?!!........
-best and worst bits about returning to Cairo......

well..... there are prob lots more topics i want to cover, once i start writing I get inspired and just go for it. But you get my jist- lots of blogging to come in the very near future. Bet you are all soooo excited now!!! I guess this is a bit like a blog trailer then.....

1st I have a last day of organising and seeing family and spending time with my lovely wee nephew Sam, who turned 2 last week... so cute!!!

End of 2007, start of 2008

what can I say?????????

all of 2007 I have been working on a boat on the Nile as a bellydancer in Cairo. My dreams have come true!!!!

but then -no one is ever happy to stay where they are.... so of course I have yet more dreams and hopes for 2008- but they all involve me staying on here in Cairo-

so this '6 month' trip to Cairo- which will be 2 years after only 2 more months.. will extend yet again. Apologies to those of you in Scotland who miss me and were hoping to have me back soon- but thank you all for the support and encouragement you have given me which does really help!!!!!

Christmas was unusual! My first in Cairo and it was wonderful to have Clair, Cathrine and Michele here to stay and help me celebrate it! We had a long lie, and then opened pressies on the balcony in the sunshine. Then , after a quick stop in a the costume shop to order a couple of cossies, we had a felucca ride on the Nile at sunset with a couple of gin and tonics, a water edge cafe next for some sheesha and cuppa and then onto a friends house for the whole turkey dinner thing. A wonderful day.

The hardest thing about christmas here was missing my family. It was my 1st ever christmas away from them ever.... and I cried when my young cousin (5 years old) called me in tears to say she REALLY really missed me and wanted to dance with me!!!!!!!!!!!! and although I had her, and me, giggling by the end of the call, I would have prefered a cuddle! Ah well........ the price you pay for something you really want has got to be high I guess......

The weird thing about Christmas here was having to remind myself all day that it actually was christmas- I forced the girls to wear tinsel around their necks all afternoon to help remind me.... and we decorated the felucca beautifully! (photos to follow once Michele has downloaded them!!!!) Lovely having my friends here with me!!!

Talking about friends- I have one who moved to USA to follow his dreams too and now find he has even quoted me in his Blog!!!! check it out (esp if you are interested in writing and/or psychology!!!) http://www.todayiwrite.com/

So Hogmany tonight and I will be dancing on the Nile Pharoah from 10.30pm- 1.30am..... so seeing in the New Year the way I hope it continues- ie with lots of work and dancing on the Nile. Its been a long year with lots of ups and downs......... but I feel things are really beginning to work out now.... so I am happy with that.

I hope your dreams come true in 2008 too............ and if you dont really know what your dreams are- then THINK ABOUT IT- how can they come true otherwise!!!!!!!!!

hate it

I really hate being treated like a mushroom- kept completely in the dark- as if it's all got nothing to do with me, told nothing about anything thats going on... then fed bits of information when I push for it......

grr
can't say much more about it all right now...

but lets just say Ramadan work is not progressing as I was led to believe it would.

I don't know whether to cry, laugh or kill someone.

Blog connections

this evening I sat in, being interviewed by a fellow blogger for an article she wants to write about me in her own blog.

Her name is Maryam and she is a friend of a good friend and lives in Morocco. Her blog is about her life there and how she and her family adapt to life there, from life in the US. I thought maybe some of you would be interested in reading about her experiences...........

check it out www.moroccanmaryam.typepad.com

She told me the article on my life in Cairo will be in over the next few days- so keep your eyes open for that (hope she writes nice things!!!!!!!!!!) The world is sooooo small isn't it?!

My life since Fifi..........

Work has been up and down recently. With 5 dancers working the boats (and only 2 can work any one night) that means there is more time Off than On. Not good financially- or from a fitness perspective either. Plus I have changed my drummer- so learning about the new one is challenging and fun.

On wed night I did the best performance so far of my life. It was the table solo (pretty much the 1st with this new guy) and the audience was really lively and cheering and clapping and shouting throughout my whole set (in a good way!). So when it came to the solo they were already on their feet ( a few literally!) .

I had one part in the table solo, where i did a one hip shimmy- and suddenly the room went dead- completely silent- all these Egyptians and Arabs who had been cheering and shouting etc etc suddenly -nothing. I put in my head Fifi and kept the shimmy- not altering it, not trying to do anything fancy, not even looking at people- looking at my hip that was shaking ........... and held that silence for ages until I suddenly went into hip drops and the audience went crazy again. I swear- I have never had that sort of feeling in my life before - ever! I felt like the most powerful woman on the planet. Amazing. Thanks Fifi for the inspiration!

Another part I enjoyed was when i do chonks down into a crouching position- which usually goes faily fast- but the new drummer follwos me, rather than the other way around, so I was able to play my audience much more effectivly and take my time and half way they started to applaud so I did the hand signal to them to wait (lissa) ie there is still more just wait, and they all laughed with me and voiced what my hand signal had meant etc etc and when i got to the bottom I rested my chin on my hands- a couple started to tentitively clap and i gave them the all clear and they went crazy again.................. wow.............!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I really felt Like I was doing what I should be doing in my life, and in the dance.

One woman who had been there that night, came back to the boat on friday night and spoke to Otti who was dancing that night and the girl who helps dress me, saying she felt my body was '100% sharqi'- ie I was truely an oriental dancer. I felt so chuffed to hear that- although to be honest, the feeling I got from the audience was enough for me!

I danced again last night- and again had a good crowd... not the same... but fun and challenging and the show went down really well- I find I am 'finding' new moves (or maybe old ones that I had forgotten) because of my new drummer...............

life is good- I am having so much fun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Evening news article wed 11/7/07

well- Elspeth's suggestion that I let the Evening News know I was coming back from the real pyramids, to the ones on portobello beach worked- Thanks for the PR advice speth!!! while I was home they interviewed me and photographed me for this article which I have copied and pasted for those of you who missed the evening news on wedensday night.
I've also edited it slightly... (my comments are in brackets in this colour!!!)

Porty's Lorna wobbles way to Cairo fame (shaky intro me thinks!!!)
ROSALIND GIBB

THE dancer casts her audience a sultry look from behind a sequin-edged veil as she gyrates barefoot on the Cairo restaurant boat's tiny dance floor. Her close-fitting gold Saaidi dress shows off her hourglass curves as she moves.

As she tosses her head seductively, the light reflects off her cascading dark locks. In a mesmerising movement, her hips circle to one side, then low down and up fast on the other side, and the audience of Arab diners is left spellbound.

Despite her skill, the dancer working on the Golden Pharaoh restaurant boat on the Nile is not an Egyptian who has been belly-dancing all her life. The stunning performer is (age missed out thank you very much!) Lorna Gow from Edinburgh, who has been wowing Egyptians with their own art form since she arrived in Cairo 15 months ago.

It's a world away from overcast Portobello, where she is staying this week on a visit home to see family and friends.

Born and bred in Edinburgh, Lorna became the first Scot to belly dance professionally in Cairo when she emigrated there just over a year ago - quite a feat for someone who had never tried any type of dance until she was 21, and only took up a belly dancing nightclass as a fun way to keep fit.

Lorna works on the Nile and Golden Pharaoh boats, cruising restaurants that cater for both tourists and Egyptians.

She says: "I love it, dancing on stage every night to an audience that, because of the culture, understands and appreciates what I'm doing. It's great working with Arabic musicians too. You are really interacting with them and the dancer plays a big part in creating the music."

Lorna was working for the Department of Work and Pensions (in my day it was called 'the benefits agency' - didn't realised it had changed?!!) in Wester Hailes when she began her journey into the exotic world of belly dancing.

Quickly realising she had an aptitude for it, before long she was called upon to begin teaching.
She became one of the main belly dance teachers in the area, taking around 20 classes across Scotland.

Her love affair with Cairo began on a dance holiday to the city ten years ago, and it cast such a spell over her that she returned around 20 times in 11 years, even organising trips for her students.

Then came the opportunity for a long-term stay. "When I was thinking about auditioning for the job I really wasn't sure I'd be good enough," she says.
"But numerous people I spoke to said I should go for it. I asked one of the top choreographers, Raqia Hassan, how long she thought it would take before I'd be capable, and she said I was good enough now, which gave me loads of confidence."

Despite having a fiance in Edinburgh, Lorna moved to Cairo in March last year, originally for six months. Those six months have grown into 15 but Lorna has been relishing the experience.
"It's a mad, chaotic, crazy, dirty city, bustling with life and passion," she says. "I love it. It feels real here. People are very hospitable and the weather is a heck of a lot better.

"They live the day during the night in Cairo, because of the heat. They do things during what we might think of as unsociable hours. For example, after a show at about 1.30am, I will phone a friend and arrange to go for a meal. Shops are open until midnight. It's a 24-hour city.
"It's so huge you can't have everyone rushing around at the same time, so I suppose they do kind of shift living.

"The hardest part has been learning the language. It's getting easier though. None of my musicians speaks (much) English so, for about six or seven hours each evening, I have to speak Arabic."

Lorna performs her half-hour show up to six times a night and the number of performances requires a high level of fitness.
"Physically it's very demanding and especially in the heat - it can be 30 degrees at one in the morning," she says.

"But I know I am very lucky, finding something I am good at and that I love so much."
She also credits one of her teachers, Sara Farooq, as having helped the credibility of her performances. "She is fabulous at helping me get into the heads of my Egyptian audiences and really understand what the songs and music are about," Lorna says.

As well as the boat tours, she also performs at weddings and private parties. With her brown hair (naturally blonde, she dyed it when she arrived in Egypt) and dark eyes, many people assume she is Egyptian.
However, she says it doesn't surprise people too much when they learn she's Scottish.
She explains: "Around half of the top belly dancers in Egypt are foreign. Egyptians have a feel for dance that you strive to get. But foreign dancers are generally better trained and perhaps have better technical skills."

Lorna says another obstacle apart from the language has been the bureaucracy and red tape she's encountered. "You really need to know people to get anything done, so obviously that is getting easier," she says.
"Another thing I find difficult is the hassle from men.
"Just walking along the road is like walking past about 20 building sites at once, and it is really wearing."

Lorna returns to Edinburgh every three months to see family and spend time with her fiance. She met Khalid, who owns the Moroccan Restaurant on Dundas Street, when she performed at the opening night.
So how does she cope with such a long-distance relationship? "Thank God for MSN!" she laughs. "We talk every night. He comes out to visit and I return to Edinburgh regularly.
"It can be trying for a relationship, but I think if we can survive this, we can survive anything."

As for the future, she is not making any set plans. "When I first came I meant to stay for a summer, and have now been here for 15 months," she says.
"So I don't want to make any promises about coming home. I've achieved what I set out to do, but there's always another step.
"First I wanted to dance in Cairo, then to get a work visa, then to dance with a band. I've done all those things, but now I want to dance with an orchestra - which would be amazing. You simply can't plan in a city like Cairo, it doesn't work like that, but that's partly what makes it such a special place because you just never know what's next."

IT'S ALL IN THE HIPS
BELLY dance is a Western name for an Arabic style of dance developed in the Middle East. It consists of percussive movements of the shoulders contrasted with slower fluid moves of the hips and torso.
It is big business in Egypt and the Middle East, where the top dancers have their own orchestras and limousines.
Dance teacher Hilary Thacker, who runs Hilary's Bazaar on George IV Bridge, which sells oriental clothes and dance costumes, is holding summer classes at Chi 36 on George Street and South Leith Parish Church, starting on July 24. Visit her website at www.hilarysbazaar.com or call 0131-556 7976 to book.
Dance Base in the Grassmarket, where Lorna Gow used to teach, also runs belly dancing classes. A new term will start in September. For more information call 0131-225 5525.
Participants should wear comfortable clothes and bring a scarf to tie around their hips.
This article: http://edinburghnews.scotsman.com/features.cfm?id=1074972007

The article had a photo too.... although I have a few more from that photo shoot which I'll add later (literally just in the door from the airport just now!)

San Franciscan wedding….

Well…. I have known about this trip for quite a while, but couldn't write anything on the blog about it because I was booked to perform at a friends wedding, in San Francisco, by her mother, as a surprise gift to the bride and groom. I've never been a wedding present before!!!!

So Vanessa and Dave got married on 7.7.07. Lucky for some. It certainly seemed to be for them- the sun was shining, the fog stayed away and it was really one of the most beautiful weddings ever. The ceremony and reception were held in a field/ garden area on top of a 'mountain' with the most superb drive through the redwood forests to get there and stunning views that would compete with many Scotland has to offer (although less green!). It all took place in Sonoma County- ie the home of Californian wine; so much of the drive there was through vineyards (called wineries!!!) along winding country roads. It really was like a Scotland with sunshine and I can see why so many Scots have settled over there. The latest of course being Dave.

I had a very Californian moment the day before the wedding, being driven around by one of Vanessa's sisters in her convertible Mustang, with the music full blast and the wind knotting up my hair. I swear my jaws hurt from smiling so much!!!

It was also lovely meeting so many wonderful people. What a friendly bunch- and the Californians among them so much more real and genuine than the ones I have met in the past from LA. Friends of the bride put me up without having met me previously and really were wonderful hosts- cooking amazing breakfasts and driving me round some of the loveliest scenery. The Scots there were lovely too…… with many of Dave's family (including his gran who was in her 90's) having travelled from Scotland especially for the event.

I danced at the wedding during the meal.. Starting by being escorted onto stage with the bagpiper playing 'Scotland the Brave' (maybe a good choice for the 'wardrobe malfunction' that was to follow!) Thank god people in the audience had safety pins on them- that’s all I can say!!!!

Vanessa and Dave had their first dance as a bellydance- which I have to say they followed so well that it looked like we had practised and choreographed the whole thing- well done guys!!!. Then I had all the tartan (or plaid as they call it there) wearers join me on the dance floor and when that started being a bit too male orientated, I had all 10, yes 10, of the bridesmaids join us too. I must look to see if anyone has added it onto utube yet!!!

you can view some photos from the wedding on http://www.flickr.com/gp/14513449@N00/s521nf
enjoy!

My Cairo CV so far........

I suddenly realised that although you, my blog readers, now know about my regular contract at the Nile and Golden Pharoah boats, you may be interested to know some of the other places I have danced in Cairo....... some were a one off occasion, a few were regular gigs!..........

Movenpick (airport) Hotel (regular performances and weddings)
Novotel Hotel (regular performances)
Grand Hyatt Hotel (weddings)
Mena House Hotel (corporate dinner)
Cairo Sheraton Hotel
Sonesta Hotel
JW Marriot Hotel

and others............ (including a wedding in a private villa in the middle of a mango grove, where the dance floor was glass over a swimming pool and they had a fake snow machine on while the couple did their 1st dance!!!)

no way at all....

Just no way..................
no way at all.......................
there are many jobs you can do after 12 hours vomiting and diarrhoea....... but Bellydancing on a boat is not one of them! The idea of having to run offstage straight to the loo..... no- just couldn't do it!
Thank god they were able to get a replacement for me tonight...... thats all I can say! Inshallah all will be well by tomorrow!
It was always my biggest fear about working here- that my stomach would play up when I was due to perform- well- the fear has been realsied and lets hope it doesn't resurface!!!!

Lorna (of Cairo!) performing in Edinburgh, June '07

As many of you know- I'll be coming home to UK to perform and teach at the Raqs Britannia festival in Blackpool at the end of June.

However, I know many of you, can't make it to that event- and i love dancing for my friends, family and students...... so I have decided to perform in Morocco Restaurant for 2 NIGHTS ONLY, before heading to blackpool.

WED 27th June
THURS 28th June

I hope a few of you can come along since it would be great to see you and catch up (and since I am only home for a few days it won't be possible to socialise as I'd like to!) Also- I'll be able to tell you all the stuff I can't put in my blog about dancing in Cairo!!!!!!!!!! (Plus the 29th is my birthday- and since I'll be in blackpool for it- then this is kinda my celebration for that too!!!!)

warning- book soon........ since this will be my only performances in Scotland before November,when i am home for a week or so, I suspect it may be rather busy these nights (hope so anyway!!!!) (0131 652 3764 to book!)